What I Know About London So Far

When I posted the other day about moving to London, it sounded like I’ve never even visited the place. That’s not entirely true… so in order to prove that I’m not a total hillbilly I’ve been trying to remember the dozen or so occasions that I have been to the city, and recall some of the details. I contemplated sticking up some pictures to accompany this post, but really, no one needs to see me standing in a Harris Tweed skirt, clutching a bottle of water and pointing excitedly at the Camden Town tube sign. You’ll just have to take my word for it on the existence of that classic shot.

At some point, soon after finishing high school, I went down for a weekend with my Mum, and stayed in the spare room at my brother’s house in Ealing. My abiding memory of that trip is that he had a noise-activated clock that lit up and projected the time on the ceiling if you clapped your hands. Unfortunately I had a cold, and every time I coughed during the night it also activated the damn thing and flooded the room with light. Between that and the flat’s location directly under the Heathrow flight path, it was not the most restful of holidays. Other than that, all I can remember is having my photo taken beside all the street names that I’d hear of, like Covent Garden, Leicester Square and the aforementioned Camden Town. Probably a habit I should drop if we’re moving there.

My chronology might be a bit off, but I think the next time I was down was a year or two later with my lovely friend Katy; we were both on a mission to do interviews with writers for Fest magazine. We shared a room at a hostel in Bayswater and then she headed off to interview Alain de Botton at his house near Paddington, while I headed off to interview Howard Jacobson at his flat in Soho. She came back disappointed that Alain was prematurely balding, and not as attractive or youthful as the picture on the back of his books had led her to believe. I came back disappointed than Howard had been a prickly and awkward interview subject, and deeply un-cooperative with the Fest photographer. His flat was lovely, though. Katy and I consoled each other on the South Bank, sitting in the sun and drinking several large glasses of wine.

The longest I’ve ever spent in London was three weeks around Christmas 2004 when I was doing an internship at a national newspaper. I split my time between the arts desk – calling John Berger for his reaction to Susan Sontag’s death, trying to track down Paul Rusesabagina, the inspiration for the film Hotel Rwanda, and contributing to numerous end of year highlight lists – and the news desk, which was full of people frantically trying to keep up with the stories coming in about the Indonesian tsunami. It was not a jolly time.

On Christmas Eve, when everyone else in the office went home to their own families, some friends of a friend of a friend briefly adopted me. I went to a church service with a wonderful, kind family I didn’t know, gatecrashed their Christmas Eve dinner, watched the Snowman with their toddler children, and was then dropped me off at a Travelodge near Kings Cross. I drank miniatures of vodka, and paid £12 to watch a bad porn film (is there any other kind?). On Christmas morning an ex-boyfriend collected me, and we spent the day delivering meals to the elderly in Hammersmith. On New Year’s Eve, I sat alone in my brother’s flat, (with that damn light-up clock again), watching the fireworks on television, eating M&S tiger prawns out of a plastic tub and drinking a bottle champagne that I’d bought last minute at Waterloo station. As I said, it was not a jolly time.

I’m very grateful to the London friends who tried their best to take care of me over those few weeks – I was treated to lunch in Covent Garden, pints in Soho, and copious quantities of dim sum in Chinatown, but despite their best efforts it was a pretty miserable festive season. I drank too much, relied too heavily on Big Macs, and got lost on the tube a lot. I went to a pantomime at the Old Vic… by myself. Ian McKellen’s Widow Twanky was wonderful, but there can be few things sadder than being a 21 year old single woman and going to panto on your own.

Fortunately, the next time I was in London for any length of time – early 2006 – I was in great company. I’d been selected to do the Ben and Jerry’s/WWF Climate Change College, and was there with my fellow students for a few days of workshops. We stayed in a funky little hotel in Earls Court, and attended some amazing lectures at the Royal Geographical Society before heading out for food and dancing every night. At the end of the week, we all headed to the IMAX cinema and attended the first UK Screening of An Inconvenient Truth. There is another picture of me somewhere looking goofy beside Al Gore. Forgive me if I don’t dig that one out either.

Most recently, I have known London through quick visits for work (pre DorkySon), and occasional weekend trips with DorkyDad (also pre parenthood!). Here is what I know. There is not one London, there are many Londons – millions, even. Every resident of the city has their own favourite park, and pub, and specialist shop. It is easy to wander down one street and find a tiny wee Italian restaurant, where you can watch the chefs kneading your pizza dough, and then wander down another and chance upon a beautiful public square full of birds and squirrels and people sitting on picnic rugs. If you want to buy a silk tie there’s a place for that, and if you need a particular brand of chilli sauce there’s a place for that. Until now, I have barely scratched the surface of the place… I can’t wait to get there and dig a little deeper. More importantly, I can’t wait to go to the panto again this year… this time with my family.

DorkyDad does the ‘Gator in Galway

DorkyDad and I are just back from a wonderful weekend in Galway, celebrating the wedding of two very good friends. DorkyGranny was kind enough to babysit, so it was just the two of us (and 100 other guests, obviously!). Other than the wedding itself, which I don’t think I can write about yet without being too gushy, here are a few of the noteworthy moments.

No DorkySon!

Packing to go away without DorkySon was stranger and more stressful than I expected it to be. “Oh my gosh, I’ve no room for nappies. Oh no wait, I don’t need nappies. And I probably don’t need all those Organix oat bars either. Hmmm, I wonder what make-up I’ll wear at the wedding. Ach, I’ve loads of space, I’ll just take it all. And what jewellery am I going to wear? Ach, I’ve still got loads of space, I’ll take all my jewellery with me too. Where’s that Peppa Pig magazine? Oh, I don’t need that, do I? So I can take a book! And my camera! And my iPad! And all my bras! No, I probably don’t need all my bras, I’m only there for three days…. three days, hmm. I wonder if we can cram everything in or if we’ll have to narrow it down. Can we have Guinness and oysters for lunch AND a traditional pub meal in the evening, or can we only choose one? I wonder if we have to book ahead. Or maybe just wait and see how DorkySon’s feeling. Oh no, wait, he won’t be there. I might get a massage! What should I wear in bed? I wonder if they’ll have shampoo or if I should take some miniatures. Oh gosh, the last time I used those miniatures was in hospital after having DorkySon… When I’d forgotten the nappies. Must remember nappies this time… Oh no, wait…” And on it went. I guess I’m normally so busy remembering everything I need for DorkySon that I just throw a few things into a bag for myself without thinking about it. I hadn’t realised how much easier that is! I also hadn’t realised that even without DorkySon there, we would continue to point out tractors and diggers to each other, which is a little worrying…

Irish Cabbies!

Irish taxi drivers are the best. Truly. Our first one – Patrick – picked us up at the airport and headed off in the direction of our hotel, only to stop at a petrol station 200 yards down the road so he could buy a bag of sweets to share around the car. He then spent ten minutes talking about his biggest claim to fame, which is that his uncle appeared in some of the crowd scenes in The Quiet Man. Our second cabbie – Sean – spent the whole journey shaking his head and wondering what the world has come to. Apparently his son is at university in the UK and one of the lecturers there is a cross-dresser. Nothing wrong with that, he was at pains to add, but having seen the man he just wishes that his mini skirts were a couple of inches longer. Our third cabbie – Joe – has 21 grandchildren, and can remember every one of their birthdays, although it almost bankrupts him to do so. Bless you, Irish cab drivers, for the most entertaining car journeys I’ve had in a long time.

Food and Drink!

So what do you know, Guinness really does taste better when you drink it in Ireland. And much like we Brits enjoy talking about the weather, the Irish like to speculate often, and at length, about just why that is. Unfortunately, DorkyDad and I did not find a definitive answer, but we did enjoy testing the stuff in several bars and pubs, just to be sure that standards weren’t slipping… We also enjoyed  amazing falafel from the Gourmet Offensive stall at Galway Market (I know, I know, not exactly traditional Irish fare, but awesome nonetheless), and the best seafood chowder ever at O’Grady’s on the Pier, which we slurped while sitting in a window seat, looking out over Galway Bay. Add to that an amazing four course wedding meal, and potato cakes with black pudding for breakfast three mornings on the trot, and I’ve discovered than it’s not just in the States I have to watch my waistline…

Dancing!

So you know at the end of the night at a Scottish wedding, the band or DJ plays something like Auld Lang Syne or Loch Lomond so that everyone can join hands for a big old lovely sing-a-long? In Ireland, the last song of the night appears to be the theme from Riverdance; so all the drunks can get up on stage and indulge in some tippity-tappity-foot-stomping shenanigans. It’s a beautiful sight. On the subject of dancing, this may be one to add to the ‘Things They Didn’t Tell Me About Parenting’ list – or indeed, perhaps just one that I should keep to myself – but it seems that my post-birth pelvic floor is no longer up to the task of letting me pogo along to the Proclaimers’ 500 Miles. Two years after DorkySon was born, I suddenly realise why I should have spent more time doing kegels. My shame at being unable to relive the songs of my student days without needing a change of knickers was made even worse by DorkyDad’s impressive dancefloor exploits. He surprised us all with his energetic gator dance. He got a shout out and a round of applause from the lead singer in the band. And his new favourite expression is ‘cutting some shapes’. I am praying that there is no photographic evidence of my experience, but extensive evidence of his. ..

And a few random, unrelated discoveries: If you want to buy a Maori style hand-carved bone necklace, you don’t need to go as far as New Zealand. If you want to go to Galway and dine on the Orient Express, you can do so. And when the religious traditions in your country don’t allow for condom machines in your public toilets, the slightly bemusing alternative appears to be vending machines that dispense Toffee Poppets. Cead Mile Failte indeed.

Live In The Now: July

Pink blossoms on a blue background with the slogan 'live in the now'

Okay, I promise this will be my last holiday-related post. After this I’ll get my head together and start focusing on life in not-so-sunny Scotland again. But our ten days away were too full of good moments not to share at least some of them. This also serves as my ‘Live In the Now’ post for July, because it captures so many details that I don’t want to forget.

The Travel!

Well, the travel itself wasn’t exactly awesome. In fact, I dedicated an entire post to how much I dislike flying. But what I loved was discovering what an amazingly good traveller DorkySon is; five planes, three taxis, three buses, two cars, one train… and not a single toddler meltdown. I would love to say that it was our thorough preparation that led to the smooth journey, but in fact we’re just incredibly lucky to have a mellow two year old, who barely seemed to notice the delays and queues. He slept on almost every aeroplane, attacked the inflight meals with gusto, and beamed at the cabin crew every time they passed our seat. He was thrilled by the taxi rides, excited by the bus journeys between terminals, and is still talking about his ‘special seat’ in the hire car. Whereas DorkyDad and I usually ended up crumpled, tired and crabby, DorkySon emerged from every journey with a smile on his face and ready for the next adventure. I don’t know how he did it, but he’s a champ. Continue reading

Painting the Town: Street Art in Portsmouth, New Hampshire

fly

I’d only been to Portsmouth, NH, once before this holiday. So I wasn’t sure if the amazing artwork painted on building around the town was a permanent feature or a special exhibition. A quick Google search on my return revealed that they were part of the Street a.k.a. Museum exhibit, curated by the Portsmouth Museum of Art.

I’ve had a wee look at this map which gives the locations of all the artworks, and although I didn’t manage to spot them all in the couple of days we were there, here are the ones I did find: Continue reading

DorkySon’s ‘Too Big’ Adventure

We’re just back from a fantastic holiday to North America, where we saw a lot of friends and family, enjoyed some great weather, and ate far, far too much. There were many highlights, which I hope to have time to write about over the next week or so, but I thought I’d start by sharing DorkySon’s perspective on things.

On our first full day in Canada, Uncle P offered to take us to see Niagara Falls. DorkyDad had been before, but neither DorkySon nor I had, and I was looking forward to it. I wasn’t disappointed. How beautiful is this?

Continue reading