I have been trying to write this post for months, but it has been left lying dormant in my drafts folder. I’ve thought about it a lot, but when it came to the writing I couldn’t get beyond the first line. At least I couldn’t until last night, when I had something of a lightbulb moment.
Here’s that troublesome first line:
“I never realised how physical it would be, having a little boy.”
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One of DorkyDad’s poems is called One of the Questions Coming – and it’s a lovely, funny piece where he imagines how he’ll respond on that inevitable day sometime in the future when DorkySon asks him if he ever did drugs.
We have not reached that stage of questioning quite yet, but DorkySon has hit me with a few curious toddler curveballs recently, and my parenting skills are being tested to the max. Never mind all that stuff about how to put on a nappy or burp your baby – where’s the chapter in the textbook that tells you how to answer when your son asks ‘Why don’t you have a penis, Mummy?’
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This time three years ago, I was spending my second day in hospital after a long and fairly messy birth. DorkySon still didn’t have a name – we had been so sure that we were having a girl that we hadn’t really given much thought to boys’ names – and it was almost a week before we finally settled on one.
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Every so often we seem to go through short spells where DorkySon makes lots of developmental leaps at once. You’d think we’d be used to it by now, but we’re not; DorkyDad and I are still left looking at each other in shock, and asking where our little boy has gone.
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We’ve got a good little routine going in the mornings, these days. When DorkySon wakes up – usually sometime between 6.30-7am – I go through to get him out of his cot, change his nappy, and bring him through into our bed for some milk and cuddles.
One of my favourite parts of the day is the couple of minutes it takes me to do his nappy change in the near-dark. I’m always pretty bleary-eyed, but most days he’ll sing me a wee song, or tell me what he dreamed about that night, and it’s a lovely start to the day.
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Dorkymum | Stories from Tasmania 