Category Archives: Family

Time as Healer

October 22, 2012 By in Family Tags: , , , , 11 Comments

clock on marble fireplace

I have been reminded this week what an excellent healer time can be, and how much respect we ought to give it as something which can solve our problems.

I wrote up my birth story last week, and I was amazed at what a different perspective I was able to have writing it so long after the event.

I took copious notes shortly after giving birth to ensure that I would always have an accurate record of how things went chronologically, and also have a copy of all my medical notes, so it’s not that the hard facts have changed. It’s that something which traumatised me at the time and contributed massively to a year of postnatal depression is now something that I can genuinely laugh at in parts. I have not forgotten the difficult bits (of which there were many) but they don’t define me anymore. The passage of time means that I am no longer the woman who cries all the time while sitting on a doughnut cushion.

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Friendship

October 20, 2012 By in Family, Nostalgia Tags: , , 13 Comments

heart made of leaf

I’ve been pondering the notion of friendship a lot recently, and admitting to myself how hard it sometimes is to have your friends scattered all over the world as we do.

I had a lovely Skype chat with a friend in Australia the other day. I used to schedule those chats for a time when DorkySon was here, but now I wait and do it while he’s at nursery, otherwise the entire hour is taken up by him showing off all the cars in his toybox. We usually manage to catch up every couple of months, and it’s always great to hear how she is settling into her new life, how work is going and all the rest of it. But it’s not quite the same as when we used to sit and watch a chick flick together with a bottle of wine and a pizza. It’s especially hard when there are big things going on in each other’s lives. Celebrating good news (or commiserating about bad news) several weeks after the fact, via computer screen, doesn’t feel quite as effective as an in-person hug!
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Feeling Better

October 18, 2012 By in Family, Harpenden Tags: , , 17 Comments

smiley face

You know that thing where you don’t realise how cruddy you’ve been feeling until you feel better?

That.

I finally got round to making an appointment with a new acupuncturist a couple of weeks ago, and spent an hour on a Saturday morning having needles stuck in me.

As I usually do afterwards, I then spent the rest of the day feeling pretty drained and exhausted. But the two weeks since then have been something of a revelation.
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Naptime

October 11, 2012 By in Family Tags: , , , , , , , , 27 Comments

I can honestly say that I have never been one of those parents who express regret about the passing of time. It has given me great joy to see my baby turn into a toddler, and my toddler turn into a preschooler.

I want DorkySon to grow up. I want him to become more confident and independent of me, to do things on his own without my help.

Perhaps it has been easier because he is naturally a quiet and fairly reserved boy, and I am more used to giving him gentle, encouraging nudges to try new things, rather than trying to hold him back from activities that he’s not yet ready for.

That said; all his big developmental stages have started on his say-so rather than mine. He indicated very clearly that he wanted to stop breastfeeding at 9 months. He decided when he was ready to start using a potty, and when he wanted the bars taken off his cot.

The next big thing on the horizon is probably going to be dropping his nap. I feel incredibly lucky to have a three year old who still reliably takes an hour’s nap after lunch every day, but I am very aware that this time next year DorkySon will have started school, and it won’t be possible to keep that going.

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