Tag Archives: motherhood

Confessions of an Interrupted Baker

June 23, 2011 By in Guest Posts Tags: , , , , , , , 4 Comments

This is a guest post from my friend Nuala Fahey. Nuala is (in her own words) a geeky feminist Irish woman living in Scotland. She has two daughters, and a lot of yarn. She really likes hummus. 

I never intended to be an always there mum.  Before I had kids I planned to work at least part time and after having my first that was indeed what happened.  But when I was pregnant with number 2, the after effects of a certain Scottish bank nearly going bust made its way down to my corner of IT and I got the chance to leave.  Much to my surprise, I took them up on the offer and there I was.  At home with 2 kids.  But still in a very privileged position as the kids’ dad worked part time and we still had childcare so I was rarely alone in the house with both kids for long.

But then he got another job and as I wasn’t looking for work, it became harder to justify sending older kid to her childminder. And I missed her. So I became an always there mother of a 4 year old and a 1 year old. Which was great and exciting, but suddenly there was never any uninterrupted time.  I never got to finish the page of my book, the row of my knitting and I especially never got to do the sort of cooking I have always enjoyed.  The fiddly sort which involves lots of chopping and making of sauces and is totally incompatible with the wailing toddler on the other side of the kitchen safety gate – our tiny galley kitchen is too small to let her in safely. Continue reading →

Mummies Who Multitask

June 18, 2011 By in Family Tags: , , , , , 5 Comments

Black and white photo a family walking along the pavement, with the dad carryong a scooter and the mum pushing a pram containing two children

Another previously published post I’m afraid – life keeps getting in the way of new writing this week! This originally featured on another fab parenting site – The Blog Up North. 

Back when DorkySon was just a few months old, I had a moment. I was walking down the street, and for the first time I felt like I’d really made it as a parent. Why? Because for the first time I was managing to push a pram and drink coffee out of a cardboard cup at the same time.

I must have been watching too many Richard Curtis films, or reading too many chick lit novels, because in my hormone-addled head the definition of a Mummy Who Had Got Her Shit Together was exactly that – someone who could steer her baby while simultaneously sipping a hot beverage.

On reflection though, my pride doesn’t seem so misplaced. The two years since then have taught me that multitasking is one of the most essential parenting skills. “Stop running around” DorkyDad often says to me. But if I wasn’t running around – unloading the dishwasher, while also spooning mouthfuls of cereal into DorkySon’s mouth and squeezing the phone between my ear and my shoulder as I wait for someone at the doctor’s office to pick up – I wouldn’t get everything done. There are only so many hours in the day, and in order to get every item ticked off the to-do list, I often have to do three of them at once. Continue reading →

Mummies Can’t Get Sick

June 17, 2011 By in Family Tags: , , , , , , , , , 4 Comments

white mug, glasses and box of tissues on a bedside table, implying sickness

This was originally published as a guest post on the excellent parenting blog Are We Nearly There Yet Mummy? Thank you to Laura for giving me the opportunity to borrow her readers for the day! 

The DorkyBoys are sick. It is truly a pathetic sight.

DorkySon has created a little triangle of activity to make sure everyone can see how sick he is. First he stands in a corner of the room, swaying slightly and sucking his thumb. Then he walks slowly round my desk, trailing his hippo lovey along the floor behind him and occasionally fixing me with a somewhat baleful look. Finally he comes over, puts his head in my lap and sighs. I rub his hair, give him a sip of juice, and send him on his way to start the whole routine again.

DorkyDad isn’t a whole lot better. “Can I have a lemon tea?’ he croaks at me from the sofa. “Can I have a painkiller?” he whimpers. “Do you think I’ll be well enough to play golf tomorrow?” he asks, sticking his bottom lip out slightly. “Why don’t you Google ‘head cold and golf’ for me…?” Continue reading →

Things they don’t tell you about parenting… Part 2

May 20, 2011 By in Family Tags: , , , , , , , 4 Comments

toddler holding assorted coloured crayons

A couple of days ago I posted Part 1 of ‘Things they don’t tell you…’ written when DorkySon was just a few months old. This is Part 2, covering the additional lessons I’ve learned over the last couple of years.

I was foolish enough to envisage that DorkySon child would be ‘part of my life’. That he would have his own room, where all his belongings would stay, and that there would still be parts of the house, and of my life, untouched by him.

Ha! Not so! DorkySon shares everything with me. He stashes his Lego bricks in my pillowcase. He sneezes, coughs and splutters his bodily fluids all over me, just to make sure that whatever cold he has, I catch too. And if he is eating something he doesn’t like, he will expect me to stick my hand out and catch it, when he spits it out.

In return, I am expected to share everything with DorkySon. Nothing is my own anymore. He will refuse his own sandwich but insist on eating half of mine. He will want to try every cleanser, toner and moisturiser I bring in the house, cheerfully oblivious to their price tags. He empties my underwear drawer, rearranges my bookshelves, and when I’ve got visitors he has been known to walk into the room with a handful of Kotex, saying “Dat?”.

So, acknowledging that having a child is all-consuming, life-altering, and very messy, here are ten other important lessons that I’ve learned during my time with DorkySon. Continue reading →

Things they don’t tell you about pregnancy, birth and parenting… Part 1

May 17, 2011 By in Family Tags: , , , , , , , , 18 Comments

multicoloured candy worms

I’ve just found an old Note that I wrote on Facebook (remember Notes?!) from when DorkySon was three months old. It’s called “Pregnancy, Birth and Parenting: What They Didn’t Tell Me”. It made me smile, laugh, and even cry a little to look back on how I was dealing with being a new parent, almost two years ago, so I’ve decided to post it here too.

Later this week, I’ll post an updated version – Parenting A Toddler: What They Didn’t Tell Me – but in the meantime…

It has been a funny old year. I’ve gone from feeling barely able to look after myself, to knowing that I have to look after myself because I’m growing a little bean inside me, to that little bean turning into DorkySon… and having to look after him every day.

Right now it feels pretty awesome. He’s a wonderful mellow little guy, and it’s great fun getting to know him and watching him grow up. But so often in the last 12 months I’ve wished that I’d been warned about how hard it can be – pregnancy is hard, birth is hard, and parenting is hard.

All along the way I kept having moments where I thought gosh, I wish someone had told me such-and-such. So even if this note serves no purpose other than to remind myself of those moments should I ever find myself in the same position again, here they are… Continue reading →