DorkySon has become a bit obsessed about spelling things recently. We’ll be walking around town and he’ll say ‘Oooh, look at that bus, how do you spell bus Mummy?’. I’ve been getting a lot of odd looks from the good people of Harpenden as I push my son along chanting ‘c-h-e-m-i-s-t’ or ‘C-h-r-i-s-t-m-a-s-T-r-e-e’ or ‘z-e-b-r-a-c-r-o-s-s-i-n-g’.

Anyway, in an attempt to make the whole thing a bit more fun we decided it was time for him to learn about I Spy. What a mistake that was. Although he’s pretty good at working out the first letters of words – he knows that D is for Daddy and M is for Mummy and Gr is for Granny, just like Gr for Great and Green and Grumpy – he doesn’t seem to have quite grasped the concept of the game. Either that or he just likes winding his mother up…

Me: Okay, I’ll start. I spy with my little eye something beginning with C.

DorkySon: Curtains!

Me: Wow! Yes! Right first time, well done! Your turn now.

DorkySon: I spy with my little eye something beginning with… T.

Me: Truck?

DorkySon: No.

Me: Towel?

DorkySon: No.

Me: Trousers?

DorkySon: No.

Me: I give up.

DorkySon: JEEP! It’s JEEP, Mummy!

Me: But Jeep begins with a J! And there are no jeeps in here anyway!

DorkySon laughs hysterically…

Me: Okay, let’s try again… you take another turn.

DorkySon: I spy with my little eye something beginning with… B.

Me: Ummm. Ball?

DorkySon: No.

Me: Book?

DorkySon: No.

Me: Banana?

DorkySon: No.

Me: I give up. What is it?

DorkySon: LION! It’s LION, Mummy!

Me: But Lion begins with an L! And there are no lions in our house!

DorkySon laughs hysterically again.

Me: Okay, we’re going to do this once more. Do it properly this time.

DorkySon: I spy with my little eye something beginning with… M

Me: Mummy?

DorkySon: No.

Me: Magazine?

DorkySon, giggling: No

Me: Erm… Maisy book?

DorkySon, collapsing in a puddle of laughter: NOOOOO!

Me: What is it then?

DorkySon: Volkswagen Camper Van!!

Me: You know what? Let’s play hide and seek.