High Five, Liz Jones

For the next couple of weeks I’m handing over my blog to a brilliant collection of guest posters while we enjoy our Thanksgiving holiday. To kick us off in truly superb style, it’s the inimitable Motherventing. Her blog is currently lying dormant (although if you didn’t follow it when she was posting regularly, you should set aside a morning to sit and read through her archives), but she is still spouting hilarity and filth over on Twitter. She will be delighted by the fact that I’ve chosen an image of pink cupcakes to illustrate this post.

Liz Jones Mumsnet Blogfest

I recently got accused of being a ‘drama llama’ by a person.

I KNOW. Shocking, isn’t it? Basically, this person thinks I’m an attention-seeking hussy and that I PURPOSEFULLY CREATE DRAMA so that I can fill the otherwise empty void that is my life with dramatic situations that revolve, almost inevitably, around ME.

Gosh! Really? How do I manage to do anything ever? I took the bins out this afternoon. Of course, I only did that because otherwise the bin bags would rot in my back garden and then there would be a DRAMA OF MY OWN MAKING. Unless maybe, this person was referring to the actual drama that I do, within an amateur dramatics company, in which case, erm, I’m supposed to be dramatic?

Who knows. I shrug, with studied nonchalance, at the moniker ‘drama llama’, thrown so pointedly in my direction. It’s silly to accuse me thus. It really totally is. I mean, I am attention-seeking  – uh, hello, I used to write a blog, on which I once posted naked photos of myself, and divulged intimate details about sex toy purchases. And I do amdram, obvs – I just don’t care if people think I am or not.

Guess who else is attention-seeking, and VERY VERY GOOD at it too? Yes! It’s our favourite punch bag, Daily Mail columnist Liz Jones, the sperm-stealing, divisive journalist with no friends, especially not within the parent blogging community, after an ill-starred recent appearance at the Mumsnet BlogFest shindig, where, erm, she talked about having no friends because of the divisive and personal things she writes about. Blimey, Liz. Steady on. Tell us something we don’t know.

Dear old Liz wrote a column about her experience the next day, cos it’s her job to write such stuff, and the world went MENTALISSIMO in response, cos that’s what people do when she writes the aforementioned such stuff. It’s almost as if NO ONE SAW THAT COMING. People, please. PLEASE. This is what she’s paid uber-squillions to do. And yeah, she’s vitriolic and rude and objectionable, but crikey, at least she’s honest. She’s not a blogger. She’s not a mother. She doesn’t understand or empathise with or even like the target audience she was paid to appear in front of for the BlogFest, so OF COURSE she’s not going to write a column about how sweet y’all were and how welcomed she felt. No way. She actually made me chuckle, cos I have some friends who don’t blog, and they don’t get blogs, and people who blog are just freakin’ weirdos, in their opinion. Liz Jones pretty much said the same thing. She doesn’t get it. Fine. Not everyone does. There’s a stereotypical image of a ‘mummy blogger’ and she hit the nail on the head. Unfortunately people get angry and start waving pitchforks, cos Liz holds up a mirror and people don’t like what they see. But, here’s the thing – no one, apart from mummy bloggers, gives a shit. That’s why she was hired, by Mumsnet. To create the blog-storm. And we all get played.

Interesting, isn’t it, that the human quality known as being ‘attention-seeking’ has such a negative value, when intrinsically, it’s what keeps us functioning as bloggers, writers, artists, actors, politicians, teachers, etc and so on? We only want to make our mark on this world, whether it’s through bile, naked photos, or, indeed, cupcakes and craft.

You may not agree with the manner in which Liz Jones conducts her business, but oh boy, does she do it with zeal. I admire her, not for her personality, but as a very cunning embodiment of all that it means to be a drama llama. Sorry, but we need Liz Jones. We even need the Daily Mail, as much as I’m vomming a bit in my mouth as I write this, if only to remind ourselves of our own ability to discern between what’s right and wrong.

I’ll shuffle off now, before I’m rounded on and backlashed to within an inch of my ego. But I will say this: if Liz had turned around and claimed, ‘Oh yeah, I’m totally happy with what I do, no regrets, I love being alone and friendless and reviled, it’s GREAT’ then I’d have a completely different opinion of her. She didn’t, though, did she? She probably doesn’t like herself very much. What she does is tough, it’s difficult, and she puts herself through some utter shit. That, my dears, is fucking hardcore. High five, Liz Jones.

32 responses

  1. Oooh. Juicy! Happy Thanksgiving Ruth! Nice to see you back Fran. We miss your dramas, but I didn’t know you were Llama. I know someone who could write an aritcle about that. LOL!
    I was there on Saturday, have written what I think about it and, maybe, was played like a fiddle. I tried to give her the benefit of the doubt. I don’t mind the Daily Mail *cowers* and always take what she says with a pinch of salt, but what peed me off was that she had so clearly written the article – with all its preconceptions and cliched rubbish before the event. I think it’s lazy, shoddy ‘journalism.’

  2. Genius! Motherventing, I’m going to toddle off and read your blog now if there is more like this.

  3. Well, she certainly succeeded in taking a drama if twitter and the blogging community are anything to go by over the last few days….phewee! I reckon she sounds like a dried up, bitter old cow bag that doesn’t really know anything about her subject matter, but as you say, that’s why they invited her….high five to mumsnet!

  4. Hmm good piece, intertesting. Personally I don’t think we need the drama and I’d be quite happy with people spouting their vile thoughts. Glad I was not there.

    Have a great hols Ruth.

    Mich x

  5. Yeah! We’ve all been needing a bit of Motherventing! 🙂

    A brilliant take on this Liz Jones saga too, yes of course it was to be expected, it’s what she does and I would have loved to be have been there to have met her and maybe even be insulted in her article anyway, just for the hell of it!

    I used to love (to hate) Liz’s Column in You Magazine, because it is basically a weekly blog, so it is ironic in a way that she doesn’t understand why people love to write blogs. Not all of us have advertising on our blogs etc.

    It’s too repetitive nowadays though, so, I expect she is worries that she’ll be replaced by a blogger! Maybe even a (Gasp!) Blogger who has give birth!

    Look forward to your next Guest Post. Is there a page on Motherventing with links to them all in case we miss any?



  6. Pingback: A Broken Clock | dorkymum

  7. Ok, I said to myself at the weekend that I was not going to comment on any blogs about Liz Jones but am breaking that now because it is you DorkyMum and you MoVo, who I have really missed BTW! (Please come back).
    I missed out on Blogfest and was really looking forward to reading about Caitlin Moran and how fab she was, but instead my inbox was flooded with posts about how vile LJ is. Personally, I think what she wrote in her article says more about her than it does about us. She is a nonsense person who writes nonsense for a nonsense rag. It does not matter to me if Liz Jones thinks I have narrow vision or whatever else it was that she said, because I do not write my blog for Liz Jones. However, I think what we say about her does matter very much to her as I think she thrives on the drama. This is who she is and how she has made her living, you are totally right about that MoVo xx

    • I think it’ll settle down, and in the next week or two when people have had time to reflect some more there’ll be more posts about the positives. I love Caitlin Moran too, but was also interested to hear about how people like Rachel Cusk were. We’ll just have to go ourselves next year lovely! xx

  8. Nope, I’m not buying it. Not because we shouldn’t have expected it – the piece was probably written weeks ago when she accepted her fee – but because she doesn’t tell the truth at all! She tells whatever fabrication will get her the most notoriety, whatever the cost to herself or others. And this time she has done a huge disservice to intelligent women writing important articles on their blogs – because she knew that those who don’t get blogging would agree with her. Admittedly, those who have ranted since, have also contributed to the perpetuation of the stereotype of the Mummy Blogger…

    • Mumsnet do say they didn’t pay her. So it’s interesting to wonder whether she came to promote herself, came with an open mind, or came with writing this article in mind. (I suspect you’re right that it’s the latter)

      I don’t mind the folk who don’t get blogging – means there is more bloggy pie for the rest of us 😉

      Ta for comment xx

  9. Ciao MoVo! MENTALISSIMO to have you back!
    She was clearly hired for the conference to stir a reaction, she got her reaction and BlogFest got their publicity. Yep, MoVo, you cracked it. It is a drama that was planned to be a drama from the start. Nothing else.
    Of course I sympathise with the bloggers who feel hurt by her comments, but, you know what? I used to work in fashion, where I actually met Liz Jones, and that world is full of drama llamas and drama queens, so nothing new is happening here in my opinion.
    she’ll live to stir another debate another day through a shit paper that makes up drama but that people actually go and buy. freedom of speech and all that.

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